Is the Food Industry Taking Vegans For A Ride?

It’s time to throw an apple in the works

92% of all Brits eat chocolate, 59% of Brits eat chocolate every single day, and 21% of them are actively avoiding any product that they believe to have palm oil included. The landscape is changing, according to some brilliant new research out this week conducted by MPA with YouGov, who polled Brits this year. And it is changing way faster than many of us think. Thank goodness!

In 2020 I am personally back to a low-dairy-and-eggs-no-meat-at-all diet with occasional pieces of fish. Yeah, I know, a mouthful – excuse the pun. It’s complex O.K. But then manufacturers of food have made it complex as we have to wade through isle after isle of wonderfully inappropriate and often might-as-well-eat-the-pack-instead-type-foods. Take for example what I have on my desk today that my wife kindly bought for our sandwiches. She wasn’t to know, it says Vegan on the pack after all.

But I can tell you, these slimy pink slices of muck will put anyone off being Vegan for life. It’s a called ‘Vegan Quorn Chicken Slices’. Each slice has a curious stickiness that makes them feel like a bicycle repair patch coated in Vaseline and tastes not dissimilar to an imaginative combination of washing up liquid, wax, Marmite® and salty beer dregs. (I love Marmite® BTW!) but opening the packet could warrant an office offense and makes my entire office smell like a badly maintained Maidstone pub toilet on a Friday night.

An experience that was once so natural for us and pleasurable called ‘eating’ is now a confusing retail landscape of increasingly disastrous food and drink choices. I believe the processed food industry created this confusion. What’s wrong with an apple anyway? I haven’t eaten meat for years and now see wisdom in choosing Vegan, which I will do, and I am joining, according to MPA’s research, 5% of the U.K. population that might go Vegan this year.

Tell me this though. Why on Earth would you want to eat a high salt Vegan Burger or Vegan Chicken Slices? Why would I want to taste meat or imagine I am eating it, if I am choosing to not eat it? What a spectacular insult to my intelligence. Producers are making these foods taste like something I don’t want! That’s really clever….

Why not make them taste like vegetables, yeah cool idea? Oh yes, I see you can’t do that, because ‘God’ did that already – (I am not religious but using this as a term ‘God’ for something naturally created and meant to be). Apples, bananas, strawberries, parsnips already exist, and we might go buy a parsnip instead. Yes so you need to make your cash out of me being an idiot by thinking that I can buy something else that’s better than a natural product of the planet.

The planet, a mere somewhat disposable item that corporates are destroying so we can’t grow food because of induced climate change. Hmm another interesting way to make us buy stuff. Make it so nothing can be grown so we can be unhealthy forever Amen. No wonder 21% of Brits actively won’t buy palm oil.

Many processed vegan products could be slightly healthier, but that should not be a reason to buy them. The fact is they are just less unhealthy. Many products I have tried have just as much salt and loaded with mayonnaise anyway. Ok yes less fat than meat, but it’s still in my opinion, another form of profitable junk.

The word Vegan seems a great ploy now to make things appear healthy. Oh dear looks like we have been taken for idiots.

Once again!

If we had no food industry, then we would be eating apples off trees and potatoes from the ground and boiling nettles for soup perhaps. Ha! And perhaps we would not be getting so ill and we would have knowledge of the natural cures that grow in our gardens that the Pharma industry has conveniently stamped out too.

Many diseases we get are caused by too much sugar, booze, fats and salt, salt we know weakens your immune system and increases blood pressure.

The agenda to keep the population down? Georgia’s Guidestones of the population decrease? Your call.

Many of you readers work in the food industry, so this is bold coming from your trusted food editor! And what would I do without chocolate or Champagne? That could indeed hurt to abstain! But consumers are trying their best to save the planet while the greed of many (not all of course) big corporations are happily getting on with their important task of destroying it, so what can be done?

Consumers hold the power, simple, don’t buy it. Just grow it or as a great friend and Friday Lighter pointed out to me, ‘call for a day when no one buys anything at all’. He has a point. We are consuming too much. If we don’t want these products, there is only one King of the planet. That’s us, we are the ones that buy it all. We hold the key.

Yours- while actually eating an apple!

PS Luckily I am not a famous columnist- (yet) I think I would have been bumped off by now!
PSS Nestlé kindly sent me their latest Kit Kat® Gold to sample today (thanks). That’s for the Kennedy’s Confection mag’s new to the test videos on their new App – Do I deserve the chocolate? Probably not! Don’t you love life’s dilemmas!

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