It’s been an interesting week, not least because I gave a talk at the local school titled Failing Your Way To Success – the title of my next book. They seemed to really warm to it.
Failure is such a wonderful thing to have as my personal trainer. I wanted to be signed up by a literary agent and when that happened after 10 years of rejections, I discovered that my agent I dreamed of was totally off the case. Then I set my dream to get published, that failed too, so after 100’s of rejections and let downs, I then self-published my books that topped Amazon’s bestseller lists. But I thought that was a bit of a failure. I then got a publicist, huge disaster and ended up with absolutely nothing. So I then I set my heart on getting into T.V. and press (arguably quite successfully), but then I learned that it all doesn’t really mean much. I wasn’t making a difference to anyone else or myself. Ha! Failed again kiddo; the old ego fooled you again, (for around, say another 20 years or so).
You’re just on TV…. Like, so what Angus? It doesn’t mean anything really. So actually I was continuing to fail my way to succeed in finding something more worthy to fail at. Yes, go and do all the daft things first Angus, be the twit, the innocent and misguided. But if you never ever give up there is one consistent and that is that each goal is bigger and more exciting than the last. This is how you’re going to do it OK! Well, many of you are quite happy I know already, well that’s just unusual.
So as you progress through this journey of magnificent disappointments, if you keep going, you see many of your individual achievements are not really worth achieving. But they are part of a total journey and wildly essential.
So when I asked a classroom of lovely and amazing school kids, ‘how many of you have a dream?’ Hardly any of them put their hands up. I thought that was very sad, especially when kids are the masters of being in the present and adults are masters of pondering on nonsense from the past. But perhaps the kids knew that we never have one single dream, we have a tapestry of them.
Anyway things are evolving without plans, Kennedy’s is going very well indeed now after sweeping changes that had to happen in the company and I am now planning a curious occasion and guest list for my ‘Change of Life Party’. I don’t know why, but say – just in case!
You see I realised that you eventually see that you are being lead to what you could never have imagined. The beam of light comes in the end, the proof you were looking for.
But getting into television in a meaningful way is very different. It’s like walking through the woods, eating with magnificent ignorance, all the wild and poisonous mushrooms and coming out alive. There is no overnight success. Success is enjoying the tough journey. It’s just so ‘not overnight’, it’s getting across hundreds if not thousands of nights and then not even realising that you are successful because you evolved into the dream set before you that you didn’t know about!
Well I’m sticking at it because the guy that invented sliced bread was told he was a failure with it for 15 years – Colonel Sanders 1009 attempts and so on. Yes the best idea since sliced bread was considered the worst idea ever!
Next Thursday I am at the Bafta in Piccadilly (third meeting), I took the picture above as thats what it really looks like. I shall be continuing talks with a very clever and amenable television and film producer, who totally gets what I have known for decades.
‘Could this be the one?’ I was laughing to myself in the quite posh toilets in the Bafta thinking how many famous people have been in here to relieve themselves, as I stared up at the ceiling. I bet they failed all the way to the toilets too!
Every day we inch closer right, so don’t you give up, it’s taken me 30 years to just sit down with a film producer in Piccadilly. I am happy if that’s all I get. But fail and something else comes, its right; succeed and it was the one meant to be. But sit on your behind and stay on the merry-go-round and you’re stuffed. The only failure is inaction.
Yours unsuccessfully then.